pocketfulls of sunshine

Reckless, rugged, rowdy, never sitting still...

Screaming, yelling, growling, such a strong strong will.

Jumping, climbing, running, bouncing off the walls....

Chasing baby brother, not listening when mama calls.

Pushing, hitting, biting....lectures and time outs....

Mama sits and cries, while the angry toddler shouts.

Session with the toddler shrink, list of things to do...

behavior charts, and discipline, nothing is getting through

How do I reach my unruly boy, and tame his wild ways,

and help him to do what is best each and every day?

How do I get him to listen,

and learn to be gentle and kind,

I search and search for the answer...

and this is what I find....

Kiss him when he is angry, hug him when he is sad,

shut my mouth when I want to yell,

and try to not get mad....

Have patience, all though it is hard to do,

and always give him love,

and remember no matter how naughty he's been,

He is a blessing from above.

Today was a particularly trying day with my Mr. Caillou. On days like today, I become so discouraged I feel as if I want to give up and run away and hide. I love my dear boy so much, I just wish he would calm down, listen to mommy, and stop doing such atrocious things. By mid afternoon I was so mad today, I was ready to throw in the towel. I am without a car, and we needed to get to the other end of town... soooo, I put them in the bike trailer and began pedalling. Well, morning sick mama, towing 65 pounds of little ones behind her, was going quite slow. Then Caillou began slamming his helmet into Jasper's helmet. By the time we got to the bank, the yelling, biting, screaming " go away mommy" had begun. It was as if I was talking to a wall, no matter what I asked him to do, he just would not obey. We left the store, and had a timeout, which of course he out powers me, and escapes from. Then I had the joy of putting them back in the bike trailer. We pedalled slowly to Jack in the Box, I was hungry, and pissed at the bank, ( bank account negative $55 bucks) and took my bag of coins in and ordered a late lunch for us all. The screaming began again, and then the biting, and the time out, and more screaming, and not staying in his high chair. Finally the food came, and after much ranch dressing consumption between both the boys, it was time to get back in the bike trailer, and of course nobody was listening to Mommy. By the time we got home, I was exasperated, and then there was a mud battle. Every time we leave the house, I come home feeling defeated, and physically drained. Yet, he is so wild here at home, that sometimes we need to just get away from the house, give the house a little break, have a change of scenery. I try everything with this wild boy, Nanny 911 would need a good therapist if she ever came to visit my house. Today I was just plain mad, tired, exhausted, and upset. But tonight as I look at Caillou sleeping in his bed, I can't be angry. I realize I can't be mad, I can't give up, I can't yell no matter how much he yells at me, I just have to keep on praying and trying and loving this little boy. Love conquers all, right? So, tomorrow I am trying a new approach, I am vowing to stop yelling, I am vowing to hug and kiss, when I really want to spank his rambunctious little bottom, I am going to sit on time out with him, and most of all I will muster up patience, even when I feel I am going to explode. Because I love this wild thing of mine. And he needs to know I love him, and that mommy will always be there no matter what.